For the last couple of weeks I've been working as a substitute teacher. I've mostly tried to work in the elementary schools rather than the middle or high schools. Generally, I love working with the little kids, but not today. Here is a list of what we did in kindergarten today:
Ran with scissors.
Punched our seat buddy.
Jumped from desk to desk.
Stood between the computers on the desk.
Jumped off of the computer desk.
Tried to climb out the window. Twice.
Screamed at the top of our lungs.
Kicked our seat buddy.
Talked over the teacher.
Yelled over the teacher.
Ran down the hallway.
Yelled in the hallway.
Yelled WHILE running down the hallway.
Locked someone in a locker.
Hid under the desks.
Hid under a bookshelf.
Took things that did not belong to us.
Threw crayons.
Sat on someone's head.
Lost recess privileges.
Gained recess back.
Lost it again.
Missed library time because we were not behaving.
Got yelled at by the librarian.
And then we went home. And I got to write a three page sub report to the teacher. Sweet.
Hope your day was a little less... shrill than mine.
Cheers,
Red
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Problem With a Capital "Pee"
For some time now AV and I have had a slight... peeing problem. One of the buddies is peeing in our house and not in his box. And we're not talking small pees. We're talking huge I-haven't-gone-all-day kind of pees. Whoever it is tends to pee in two places: on/in piles of laundry and in their toy box. On the one hand, peeing on laundry piles isn't all that tough to deal with. Toss it in the wash with hot water and detergent and it's taken care of. On the other hand, OMG EW EW EW THERE'S PEE ON MY CLOTHES.
Peeing in the toy box (it has happened twice) is ridiculously obnoxious. We have a little cardboard box in the corner of the living room on the floor behind their cat-tree. Whenever I clean I put all their little toys in it so we don't totally look like crazy cat ladies. Jame-o also likes to dig around in it and find things to play with. Win-win. Then somebody started peeing in it.... And since we're peeing in the toy box, we're also peeing on all of our toys. That we carry around in our mouths. I totally fail to see how this is a good plan at all. So now I have a bag of pee flavored toys in the garage that I need to wash somehow.
We've been assuming it was Dannie since the problems started close to when he brought him home and our other buddies were around for a year and we only had one instance of going outside the box. And I don't even count that time... (I got Kelly and Jame-o in the summer of 2009 when I was at home in Cinci. They were staying in a little crate in the sewing room with a little bed and litterbox. Kelly was still itty bitty and playing crazily downstairs. Suddenly he dashes up the stairs like his pants are on fire. A minute later he prances back down again. When I went upstairs to see what he was doing, I saw a little poo-pile in the corner of the crate... where the litter box would have been if I hadn't just taken it out to clean.)
Well, the assumptions have, sadly, proven correct. I just caught Daniel Boone taking an enormous pee on the pants I was wearing to mow the lawn the other day. They were on the floor in the bathroom and when I was turning to dry my hands I noticed SOMEBODY squatting on them. Thanks, Dannie That's just awesome.
This also means that the pee puddle/lake Dad found in his shoe last weekend is also a gift from our dear Daniel. Yes, he peed in a shoe. Not ON it, IN it. AV and I haven't had this particular problem yet, but I'm sure there's still time since Dannie's only like six years old or so. So even if I can manage to leave my house and not totally look like a cat-lady I might still end up smelling like one.
Peeing in the toy box (it has happened twice) is ridiculously obnoxious. We have a little cardboard box in the corner of the living room on the floor behind their cat-tree. Whenever I clean I put all their little toys in it so we don't totally look like crazy cat ladies. Jame-o also likes to dig around in it and find things to play with. Win-win. Then somebody started peeing in it.... And since we're peeing in the toy box, we're also peeing on all of our toys. That we carry around in our mouths. I totally fail to see how this is a good plan at all. So now I have a bag of pee flavored toys in the garage that I need to wash somehow.
We've been assuming it was Dannie since the problems started close to when he brought him home and our other buddies were around for a year and we only had one instance of going outside the box. And I don't even count that time... (I got Kelly and Jame-o in the summer of 2009 when I was at home in Cinci. They were staying in a little crate in the sewing room with a little bed and litterbox. Kelly was still itty bitty and playing crazily downstairs. Suddenly he dashes up the stairs like his pants are on fire. A minute later he prances back down again. When I went upstairs to see what he was doing, I saw a little poo-pile in the corner of the crate... where the litter box would have been if I hadn't just taken it out to clean.)
Well, the assumptions have, sadly, proven correct. I just caught Daniel Boone taking an enormous pee on the pants I was wearing to mow the lawn the other day. They were on the floor in the bathroom and when I was turning to dry my hands I noticed SOMEBODY squatting on them. Thanks, Dannie That's just awesome.
This also means that the pee puddle/lake Dad found in his shoe last weekend is also a gift from our dear Daniel. Yes, he peed in a shoe. Not ON it, IN it. AV and I haven't had this particular problem yet, but I'm sure there's still time since Dannie's only like six years old or so. So even if I can manage to leave my house and not totally look like a cat-lady I might still end up smelling like one.
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